Male Longevity Hits Women The Hardest

A few days ago, the New York Times published an article about the life-expectancy differences between the sexes. It’s one gender-gap that we feminists don’t ever protest because it’s an inequality which favors womyn, who are the biologically superior sex by far.

The article is entitled: The Bell Tolls for the Future Merry Widow (registration required for reading.)

The background? The gap between male and female life expectancy is narrowing:

…the National Center for Health Statistics reports this month that the gap between them has shrunk to five years, the narrowest since 1946. If current trends continue, in 50 years men and women will live the same length of time.

And if we feminists actually liked men, we’d consider this to be good news.

But alas, we don’t and it isn’t.

As Kate Zernike, the author, astutely points-out: if men were to live longer, they will only use their extra years to make us wimmin miserable:

This is better news for men than for women, if you believe some economists and therapists. It’s not just the extra years; it’s all those extra meals to prepare.

The nerve! Those damned men will be able to continue breathing air which is rightfully ours! By their inconsiderate failure to croak on schedule, men will do something that winds-up hitting us poor wimmin the hardest.

That’s because in the eyes of us feminists, sharing old age with the person you’ve loved for many years can only be a complete hell for the wife. As the article informs us, everything is infinitely better once those nasty men grow enough brains to kick the bucket and give their suffering captives some peace:

Women not only do fine despite a spouse’s death, they may even do better.

“In married couples, women tend to be the ones who manage the social sphere,” said Laura L. Carstensen, a professor of psychology at Stanford University and director of the Life-span Development Laboratory there. “They’re the ones who make dinner plans and invite friends over for weekends. So a man loses a social network, whereas a woman continues to make plans and see people.”

So why don’t those bastards just up and DIE already? As long as they will us their money, that is. That’s all that they’re good for:

There is a lot of poverty among older single women, so if men live longer, that’s good economically, for women and men,” Ms. Hartmann said. “Men are generally happier when they’re married. The women may not be happier, but at least they’ve got more money.”

If I ever got married, (PUKE!) I’d simply order the jerk to throw me his wallet and jump-off the nearest skyscraper. That’d save us each a lot of trouble.

Well my systyrs, I think the next step is for us to protest the closing of this longevity gap. We must petition the government to forbid health care for elderly men so that more widows can enjoy their old age in happy solitude!

In fact, we must do everything we possibly can to ensure that men die in vast numbers and leave us on the splendid, all-wimmin planet that we feminists yearn for in our works of unspeakably bad science fiction and in our genocidal political manifestos which we proudly showcase at Sweet Briar College, as if such rantings have intellectual merit.

Update:

As recommended by the commenter Hujo, I am now looking at an article in the British Medical Journal which rejoices that when it comes to life expectancy, women are now on top everywhere! Hooray for equality! And some of the letters in reaction to it– correction, the fucking pathetic small-dicked whining in reaction to it– is quite revealing:

With distress I read your editorial titled “Life expectancy: women now on top everywhere”; from its coquettish title to the inflammatory quote by Timothy Leary, proponent for the therapeutic and spiritual benefits of LSD, all the way to the first sentence’s disdainful and sexist encouragement for “at least a quiet celebration” that women can now expect to live longer than men everywhere. Can you imagine the outcry if such a remark in a medical journal were directed towards women—well, there’s the politically correct point: such a hateful remark directed at women would never be allowed.

“Wahh! Wahh! Wahh! Look at me, I’m a fucking misogynist patriarchal loser who doesn’t understand the meaning of equality!”

Oh lookie here. Here’s another small-dicked asshole who is compensating for his small dick:

I found the tone to be offensive, particularly the ‘humourous’ title, along with the Timothy Leary quote, which seems to be an attempt to conflate an ideology (feminism) with medical findings – highly inappropriate.

Oh yeah? Well I say it’s inappropriate to NOT infuse medicine with feminism because medicine is already so patriarchal. Much in the same way that we feminists accuse every blade of grass in the world of being patriarchal.

How far has society gone when we should quietly celebrate men dieing earlier than women?

What happened to the equality movement for women? Were they even looking for equality – judging by this article, no. It is probably a testament to how focused we are on ensuring women get what they want that we actually have people ‘quietly celebrating’ mens shorter life expectancy.

Oh, sure. Blame the feminists for the fact that gleefully celebrating the superiority of women in obstensibly professional medical journals is perfectly acceptible to us when we explode into screaming tantrums whenever anyone suggests that men have even a slight biological advantage over women.

I don’t know where the author got that insane feminist-blaming idea from! Fucking bastard ought to go shoot himself in the head and do us all a favor. Goddess, that’d be fun to watch.